i'm not afraid; i'm moving on

What's on my mind:

" Everybody wants to go to heaven
But nobody wants to die "

i still love you

I've never replaced anyone in my
life.
Except for a few exceptions,
everyone keeps replacing me in their lives.
Whether it is for a while, or
forever.
Thing is, I love you guys for a
reason.
And since that day, I've never
turned back.
I still love you.

Labels: Everyone, Family, Friends, Love

Wednesday, 31 March 2010,22:20 | comment | 0 comment(s)

Can't Stop Missing You;

Hello...

I'm not in the greatest moods, but what to do? I'll get over it, I guess.Soon enough.

The day started off with Maths, we revised on our own mostly.MT; I had my oral.I was a nervous wreck, but it's done.And I'm just glad that I got it over with.We had two hours of Science since the Chinese pupils went off to take their exam.It was kinda fun.Divya and I were/are in a dangerously bad mood.

Sometimes, things happen and it's very difficult to accept.Cuz they're so abrupt and weird.

Plus, they hurt.

However changes are inevitable.And we're going to deal with them, no matter.I wanted to confide with Bro, but cuz of damn time difference, can't find him online.I miss Bro; Quite long since I spoke to him.Tomorrow's HMT exam.I'm going to be preparing tonight.Three hours, I think.

I miss my friend.

I hope everything's fine, between us.

Labels: Divya, Friends, Himanshu, Hurt, Love

Thursday, 1 October 2009,16:28 | comment | 0 comment(s)

Doing My Best

It's the lovebirds' 1st year anniversay.Honestly, I think I'm more excited than the two of them.lol.I was jumping in my seat up and down, like I was having a sugar rush.Which I was, in any case.Hehs.I'm about to study.Hmmm, till about 1800hrs.Then, free time.I might be watching 'Blood Diamond'.After than, will call a friend up and crap till it's time to sleep.Haha.

I seriously need chocolate.I need to go buy some afterwards.I'm changing; Am not sure exactly how.But I realise the symptoms from my outlook on life and a whole other stuff.Plus, my need for chocolate and hyperness have increased.It's odd since I've never been such a chocolate person, before.Oh well.Everything's for the best.

Chatting with Priya Akka and getting her advice on the matter at hand.I'm going crazy.History seems to repeat itself again and again.However, I've learnt my lesson and I know what to do now.A friend called and friend was down.I'm trying my best.I really am.I just hope it's enough.

By the way, do read the poem for the lovebirds, below =]

Labels: Changes, chocolates, Friends, lovebirds, Poems, Priya, Study

Sunday, 30 August 2009,13:46 | comment | 0 comment(s)

Feeling Better

I haven't been able to blog for quite some time.Quite some time, since I think I blog often enough.Damn.I just don't have the time.I can't even come online properly.I kept using the school computer.For free.Hehs.

I'm addicted to one Tamil song like mad.Even during yesterday's English Test, only one line from the song was running through my head.Weird or what? School is mad.Seriously.Just mad.Chaotic.And I'm being bombarded here and there.Everywhere.Argh.Frustrated.And freaking out cuz exams are nearing.Ahhh.

Actually, I don't know what to say anymore.Sometimes, I say too much.Sometimes, I don't say enough.Whatever, okay? I can't take it.I'm just going to live my life.Actually must thank Mariyah.She was scribbling in my book and she wrote quite a few quotes.One caught my eye, and boom!! The light was shining and I got it.Whatever, God wanted to say.In that one quote.Damn, I love that girl.

I'm going to hold on tight.Weee!!

Special thanks to:

Charmaine babe, Rohini baby, Bro, Haris, MRYE and Rashi...

Seriously, thanks.

Labels: Confused, Friends, School

Thursday, 13 August 2009,16:32 | comment | 0 comment(s)

Originality&&Individuality, Not Conformity

Adios, sanity.It has long gone; Flown away; Something like that.I realise I'm crapping.But really, I have no other choice.

Today was the national day celebration at school.Like most of the people at school, I too was wearing red.lol.Bought it at Lot 1, last night.The 2 hours was kinda boring.I spent most of it, reading a book.Hehs.That's me, to you.Anyways, the prize presentation for MT was slightly funny.I invited Surya to come along for Lunch.Too bad, he couldn't.

The gang, Venkat and I made our way to IMM.I think Venkat was slightly pissed that Shafiq didn't follow.We ate at Burger's King.Then, roamed around in Mini Toons.Thing is, Mini Toons is like my personally made hell.The various rainbow colours and fluffy toys just threw me off.I wanted to puke.But restrained.

Venkat made fun about my dancing, the world shaking and me walking on shops' roofs.Weird but entertaining, in any case.I was pissed, thus took the taxi home.I couldn't read a person's expression and that made me more cranky.I slept and had an absolutely vivid dream.Hmmm... Accompanied mum to the shop.She knows my secret.lol.Everyone came over to celebrate cousin's birthday.Haha.It was fun, especially when I got to decorate her face with cake!

Back to current life situation.I'm still pissed.With my feelings.It's gnawing at me, and I'm sure it's growing too.I can't stop it.Cuz, I can't help it.I like it.Haiz.

For the day:

" Nothing compares

To th moment you smile

When you laugh

It makes a crinkle

All th way to your eyes

A vague moment

You catch my eye

And I wonder

If you'll ever make me cry

I don't want to be th girl who died for you

I don't want you to die for me

I want to be th girl

That lived with you a single moment

And never asked for anything

As I died

With just that one happy memory "

-Priyaa Nedunzeliyan ©

I'm confused and guilty.Guilty for something I didn't do wrong.Guilty cuz I just care too much.Guilty, cuz I think it's wrong to think of myself.I've brought this upon myself.I don't regret.I'll live through this.And wake up to another day.Just that.It sucks when th people you thought would understand your feelings and yourself, misunderstands you th most, noticing th least.

Thanks Mum, Bro && Rohini.

P.S. I can't make it smaller cuz you won't able to read.

Labels: Confused, Friends, Outing, Poems

Friday, 7 August 2009,21:34 | comment | 0 comment(s)

Birthday Bash, Literally...

I shall make this official.

19072009-Sunday

20072009-Monday

They are the best days ever! And ever means for now.LOL.Anyways, seeing the picture below, you'll get that I had a blast with the family.True.So much of fun, yet so little time.Anyways, got to school early today cuz Divya said she had something to give me.She presented me with an orange necklace, which she said probably only I'll dare to wear.Thanked her.

Syafiqah arrived and said she needed to give tissue papers to the Council for some Enviroment thingy.Her prezzie was a pretty little Name keychain.Cho Chweet.I followed her with Divya.Mid-way, Syafiqah covered my eyes, but apparently they weren't ready so I was made to wait at the girls' toilet.After what seemed like hours (Dramatic, I know!), we finally came out.I found:

Biri, Rohini, Lavania, Anita, Habibah, Logesh, Biri's friends, Venkat and along with Syafiqah and Divya

They were waiting for me, with a birthday cake! OhMyGod, why do I get such awesome surprises?? They sang me Happy Birthday, and I cut the cake once again.I fed everyone.Syafiqah and Rohini decorated my face.Since, I couldn't find anyone else, I smeared cake on Venkat's face; Had no choice -.-

It was so cool and I was truly grateful to them, I swear.Went up and tried to take pictures with the gang.Tried is the keyword here.So now my handphone has a bunch of hilarious videos and nonsensical pictures.Biri and Lavania came down.Biri gave me a box of FR's and a handmade damn nice card.I shared the chocolates with everyone.Got a bunch of hugs too ;)

Mentioned my birthday to Mrs L and she gave me a Dove chocolate.I shared it with others too.Then during Science practical lesson, we were doing an experiment on fire.So, there was a lighted candle.In the end, for fun, Ms N wanted someone to blow it out.Damn.Yes, I blew it out.And everyone sang me Happy Birthday once more, in the Science Lab.

During CMT, had a crazy chat session with Surya, Srivatsa and Syafiqah.Orthodox has a new meaning now.Hehs.Anyways, I love my life!! Weee!! Seriously. though.I'm gifted and I appreciate everything everyone has done for me.Thank you all.Really really thank you.

`PRYIEE loves her life and you're th reason

Labels: Birthday, Family, Friends, Happiness, Happy, Life, Love

Monday, 20 July 2009,21:53 | comment | 0 comment(s)

Feelings

HeyHey

Today, I've made up my mind to do some serious blogging.Hehs.I haven't blogged properly in quite some time, eh? So, here goes everything.

Today was our school's games day.Honestly, I didn't want to go.I had no games to play, so there really wasn't any point.But, I forced my butt to get out of bed and go to school, anyways.

After morning assembly, everyone dispersed to the various venues to play their games.Divya, Roh, Kausalya and I didn't have any.So, we were watching people from the 3rd floor.That was until, a teacher told us to go support our class.Since we had no idea where they were, we just situated ourselves near the soccer field.I started emo-ing there.

I really didn't want to be there.I wanted to be far far away.Very far away from the familiar faces at school cuz I was tired.I wanted to sleep, and dream of getting lost.How dumb.Still, no hiding of the feelings.It showed quite clearly on my face.Divya and Rohini left after a while, to do council duties.So, once again I was, well, alone.Kausalya kept me company.And tried her best to cheer me up.

Then, as we spotted Divya from afar and started to make our way there, we saw something else.Biri was crying.As you'll know, I'm not very good at consoling.Thus, I was very tempted to run away.Being honest here, people.But I turned back and went to ask what was wrong.I told Kausalya to go ahead first.Apparently, while playing Captain's ball, cuz of some idiot Nelly [3/7] fell, injuring her head.Biri was scared for her and very upset with the dam referee.Who wouldn't be? When everyone was helping Nelly, the game just continued.What a load of bull!

After consoling, Biri asked me to follow her to the field.Her class boys were playing in the finals for Soccer.So, as awkward as it sounds and looked then, in the midst of Sec3s, I was the only Sec2.lol.But as promised to Biri, I cheered for them boys.When 3/7 won, I actually jumped.Haha! Which was weird and all, I just hope my cousin didn't see anything.

-.-

Then, I made my way to the 3rd floor and stood with Syafiqah and Rashidha.Our school was playing against a foreign school.Syafiqah's brother was playing.And I couldn't help laughing.They were good as a team, our school boys.Another one of my cousin played also.Prize presentation was noisu.lol.I took the bus with Hazwani.She was mumbling something about not having seen Edward Cullen yet.Surprisingly/Shockingly, however you see it, when the bus stopped in one of the stops, I saw him.I showed her.She agreed with me.Muahahaha!~

Labels: emo, Friends, Games Day, Lonely, Priya

Friday, 15 May 2009,21:21 | comment | 0 comment(s)

adventure

Helloooo!

I'm very high.

Today started with meeting Syafiqah and Rashi at interchange.We were going to some MT dialogue session.Venkat and Rohini met us there at school.Then we call teacher and found out it was cancelled.No one bothered to inform us.But we were hungry so went to IMM, and had Mac breakfast.Mmm...

I took the train with Syafiqah and Venkat.Syafiqah wouldn't shut up about Mr Cullen.Argh! So damn embarassing.I got lost at Lot 1.lol.Afterwards, took the bus home.I had a long nice bathe.Later, got ready to go CCK again.Went to the girl's house.The dogs bit me feet.

I returned home to find Vithya akka there.Apparently we were going for some cultural programme.I met Vaikesh there.We were fooled around.I met her friend too.lol.Then, now I'm home.HyperHyper!~

Labels: Friends, Hyper, Show

Saturday, 18 April 2009,22:23 | comment | 0 comment(s)

The Pursuit Of Happiness

Hello!!

I'm in a seriously good mood.GREAT!, in fact.lol.Yesterday, very good day, right after I blogged.I apologised and everything is alright.And I'm no more being eaten away by guilt.Woots!~ Plus, I'm sooo back to myself.I think the people who's happier than I am, are my friends.I really tortured them.Unintentionally, of cuz.

I went to the P2 girl's house.She's full of energy.2 hours with her, and I'm worn out.I've got to start on my homework.The sec1s in my school are very unlike us.Syafiqah and I have picked our mortal.He's good-looking aye.I wonder when we're going to bite him.Doesn't that ring a bell, Syafiqah? lol.I'm embarassing her, I know.

Today is a beautiful Saturday.But I'm at home.I wanted to go swimming tomorrow.But had to be cancelled.So, it's put of till next week.Anyone want to join me?

There's this English essay competition I've got to write.Plus, do admin stuff for the new sec1 dancers.Gosh! There's like 13 people who signed up.LOTS!! Very happy.

Though, that also means that us seniors places in the SYF is at risk.Oh well, then I must depend on three things called:

Hardwork.Passion.Discipline.

lol.The joy that's going to bring us.I'm talking cuckoo language as usual.The good part is I'm back to myself.The bad part is, lots of people are going to have a tough time understanding the nonsense I type.gtg now.

But I'll be back online later at 8pm.Syafiqah, do take note!!

I'm back!!

Some friends I have.They have mental problems.Especially Divya.I apologised.I'm done.Aren't you happy woman? You want me to do it face to face somemore.If I do that, I got to get a chair, stand over it and apologise.Darn it.

And did I mention HE is freaking HOT>>>

WELL HE IS!!

Bye

Labels: Apologising, Friends, Happy

Saturday, 10 January 2009,14:00 | comment | 0 comment(s)

First Day

OMG!!

First day of freaky Sec2 life.

Juniors.

Friends.

Teachers.

And everything else.

Syafiqah came late late to school.By the time, she made it, we were all trying to get seated.Syafiqah's hair has grown.Baby curls! Rohini is as chatty as ever.Ifah has rebonded her hair.Awkward changes.My CM is Mrs Loh/Geography teacher.

You know what she did??

She nominated me for Vice-Chairperson.

But I got secretary.lol.I'm so tired.It was as hectic as ever.I'm glad Ms C is still our English teacher.I'm sorta petrified seeing all these new faces.

Speaking of new faces, the juniors all looked... nice.Haha!! They had orientation.So, they weren't let much freedom.lol.There's so much of things crammed into this year.And we're all the way on the 3rd floor.I'm doing the CCA open house presentation with Annaletchumi.At the moment, very caught up.

I will try my best to update more.

Bye

Labels: Friends, Juniors, Sec 2, Teachers

Friday, 2 January 2009,20:55 | comment | 0 comment(s)

The New Season Of Missing

That is me and Syafiqah.Two very weird people.lol.

Today is a beautiful day.You will wonder why I'm saying this, all of a sudden.I'll tell you why.Because it's a SATURDAY!

That means, I'll be flying to India on Monday.Which is so very near.Woots!

Do you know what's the worst part? I haven't even started packing yet.lol.Just very lazy to do it, just yet.Anyway, once my mum is awake she will help me do it.I miss Syafiqah already.SO MUCH!

My uncle has agreed to come.He's mesmerising us all with his presence tomorrow.I can't wait.It's so tiring.To miss so many people, at all the same time.

I miss:

Syafiqah, My uncle, Krish,Haris, Mira, Gowri, Divya, Rashidha, Mariyah, Hazzie and so many other people.

Currently, writing a new story.My stories are so weird.It's like getting into my head, and getting lost forever.I seem to rattle off a lot, when I don't have people to talk to.I want to fill my blog full of words.As many as possible.Already, read all the books I borrowed from the library.

Thus, feeling highly bored out.It is a strange world.During school days, I dream most of the time, for the holidays to hurry.But now, that they are here, they seemed to be seriously boring.Nothing much to do, except sleep.Which is good, in any case.

Hmmm...Maybe I will continue ranting at night.

I'm back, ready to unleash my blabber.Hmm...Sometimes, I wonder why I speak like that.I know it seems a little too dramatic but that's the way I am.Gosh! I miss Syafiqah like mad.I'm driving my sis mad that way.Cuz I've got no one to talk to.lol.

Labels: Friends, Holidays, My Uncle, Syafiqah

Saturday, 8 November 2008,16:15 | comment | 0 comment(s)